May dapat ba akong kainggitan kay Ferminata?

ITONG mga azkals na alipores ni Ferminata, da gurang na lomodic tsaka (gurang na lomodic tsaka raw, o! Hakhakhak!), ay panay ang send ng mga okray na text messages to the effect na inggit na inggit daw kami sa lola nila dahil no match daw kami sa accomplishments nito. Hahahahaha!

Really? And why should I feel insecure towards her? In the first place, I was able to prove how good a teevee host I could possibly be when I co-hosted “Juicy” more than a year ago.

Honestly, Morly, Rey and I were taken in to spice up the show since it was then not doing that well at the ratings in spite of Alex Gonzaga’s fairly adequate hosting skills.

Sa totoo, kung ang ngetpalites na si Ferminatang tumutula-tula at gurangis na ay ayaw kagatin ng mga ad men, during our time, we were such a big, veritable hit!

To prove this point, twelve spots lang naman ang ad placements namin during our first week alone.

E, ‘yung gurang na ‘yang sipsipera kay Percy Intalan kaya di natitigbak, more than a year na ‘yang nagtutungayaw sa Juicy but to no avail. Hahahahahah!

Pinandidirihan talaga ng mga ad men (I repeat, men! They certainly find her presence untakably repugnant.  Hakhakhak!) for the simple reason that she’s inept and talentless!


Ang tanga-tanga kasi at ipinagpipilitan ang istilo niyang wala ng maka-relate sa ngayon kaya nagmumukhang dyologs most of the time sa kawalan ng televiewers.


Kung talagang may following ‘yan, bakit walang nanonood sa Juicy at halos mabaliw na si Percy Intalan (her number one fan! Hahahahaha!) sa kalilipat ng oras (naroroong ilagay sa after lunch na timeslot, late night at ngayon nama’y ten a.m. na yata) but no favorable results have been achieved so far. Hakhakhak!

Sino ngayon ang timang? Di ba’t kayo? Hahahahahaha!

During our time, ‘yung replays namin ay mas mataas pa ang ratings. Bakit ngayon, tigbakers si Bubonic? Hahahahahaha!

Sino ba naman kasi ang manonood sa isang matronang ngetpalites na nga mereseng ang kapal-kapal na ng make-up (How gross! Hahahahaha!) tapos nagpi-feeling matalino, ang baduy-baduy naman.

Hitsura ni Lola Basyang! Cheeaaaapppp!

I honestly don’t know why the TV5 people seem not to make a firm stand in as far as this aging woman, who’s not at all a visual delight and not in the least bit amusing or talented, is concerned.

That’s what you get for being too choosy, you ignominiously ended up with the rotten banana. Hakhakhak!

Going back to our show before, kaya lang naman nagkaroon ng pagbabago sa audience reception somewhere along the way ay dahil sa may nagmaganda (out of immense insecurity, but naturally because the public’s response to our triumvirate was simply superfab) kaya unti-unting tinigbak ang aming participation sa show and it even came to a point when they just wouldn’t want us to talk anymore.

Pa’no naman, may mga nasasapawan. Hahahahahaha!

Come to think of it, it’s nothing but a case of an enormous insecurity. Getlag mo na, Ferminatang tsaka, what really happened to our show more than a year ago?

Anyway, feeling naman ni Ferminarang gurangis at sooo laki ang tiyanetch (Hahahahaha! how gross!) at panahon pa ni Mahoma ang hosting style ay magaling na siya.

If you’re good enough, how come you’re not rating? Bakit pinagwewelgahan ka ng mga commercials, lola? Hakhakhak!

At bakit a lot of people have this impression that I’m still a part of the show when it’s been more than a year since I was out of it? Hakhakhak!

Honestly, may name ka lang dahil nu’ng time mo, syonga-syonga pa ang mga contemporaries mo. But now, your hosting style is admittedly passe, it’s best that you just retire and enjoy old age to the full. Hakhakhak!

After all, ang dami mo ng naharbat, dapat lang na magpahinga ka na at magnganga dahil ‘yan ang bagay sa ‘yo. Hahahaha


Ai-Ai delas Alas P5M ang offer ng TV5!

SHOCKING Asia but it’s true. Napaka-superfab pala ng offer ng TV5 kay Ms. Ai-Ai delas Alas.

Dati, it used to be a super-cool P3 million. But this time, they have upped it to a super-cool P5 million no less.

Quite an irresistible sum to say no to. But so far, Ms. Ai-Ai seems not to bite.

But honey, five million is five million. And money’s hard to come by these days.

Anyway, wait na lang tayo when Ms. Ai’s contract with ABS expires this coming January of 2012.

Would she be enticed to move out of ABS to join the Kapatid network?

Well, that’s the 64 dollar question that needs to be answered by Ms. Ai-Ai and Kuya Boy Abunda. Hahahahaha!


Cristine at her best!

SPEECHLESS kami sa tindi ng acting na ipinakikita ni Cristine Reyes sa afternoon soap niyang “Reputasyon” where she’s being paired off with two good-looking young men – Jason Abalos and Rayver Cruz.

Sa totoo, riveted ang mga tao sa soap na ‘to right after “Happy, Yipee, Yeheey!”

Ibang klase kasing acting din kasi ang ipinakikita rito ng comebacking actress na si Ms. Aiko Melendez kaya perfect foil talaga siya sa inspired acting ni Cristine.

Of course the most intriguing question that needs to be answered is this, who is going to get Cristine in the end?

Well, abangan na lang natin up to the very exciting end.


Amanda Coling may tiwala sa ‘The Buzz’ kaysa sa ‘Parazzi?’

COULD it be true that TV5, Mo Twister, in particular, was purportedly enormously peeved with Amanda Coling for she was paid quite handsomely for her guesting with “Parazzi” but she never did give any exciting infos about her case with the Azkal boys except an annoying no comment? Hakhakhak!

Surprisingly, in spite of the presence of her ubiquitous lawyer, the very intelligent Kuya Boy Abunda of “The Buzz” was able to get some pivotal infos from his seemingly indifferent subject.

Sa interview ni Kuya Boy, aming nalamang single mom pala ang controversial model. She has a three and a half year old kid and he/she must be the reason why she’s trying to eke out a living.

Anyway, sa The Buzz interview pa rin ng King of TV Talk, inamin ni Amanda na suitors niya sina Neal at Simon but the former gave way to the latter kaya ito (Simon) ang naiwang nangungulit sa kanya at gusto raw siyang isama sa Magallanes.

Whatever, bagama’t inamin niyang may “nangyari.” “Let me just live my life,” she pleads in earnest, “just let me.”

In the event that her kid becomes a grown-up person and asked her about what really happened in the past, what would she tell him/her?

“If not for you,” she intimates, “I would have been a totally different person.”


Super stud but he’s wanting in one department

HAHAHAHAHA! He is the fantasy of most faggots and libidinous women basically because he seems not to want of anything. He comes from a fabulously rich family, is highly educated, articulate, and a looker as well in a most masculine sense, the description tall, dark and handsome fits him to a T.

Surprisingly, women seem not to find him infinitely attractive for they just disappear just like that after having known him for quite sometime.

Of course a lot of people believe that his palpable arrogance, along with his stand-offish attitude could be the culprit.

But is it? Hahahahahahahahaha!

According to some gossippy people that we’ve had the privilege of talking to, women can tolerate his hard to deal with tantrums and condescension. What they could not palpably take is the fact that he’s all of six-feet-two-inches but his dick is definitely not proportionate to his impressive height, if you know what I mean. Hahahahahahahaha!

How so very sad pala. Hakhakhak!


Blood is thicker than water

FINALLY, Gretchen Barretto has smoked the peace pipe with younger sis Claudine.

Inasmuch as the qoundam sexy actress has maintained an enigmatic stand in as far as her relationship with Clau is concerned, the former has come to admit its veracity.

Well, blood is indeed thicker than water. I’m sure that Marjorie Barretto’s beaming with happiness at this positive development in as far as her two sisters’ personal relationship is concerned.

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