Sir Jerry Yap nag-walkout sa Hataw Super Bodies sa Metrobar!

SAYANG at wala na kami nang mag-walkout si Sir Jerry Yap sa Hataw Super Bodies affair sa Metrobar last September 6.

“Last Hataw Super Bodies search na ‘yun,” Sir Jerry firmly states when we inadvertently chanced on him at his Hataw tabloid office the other day. “Pag ginamit pa nila ang Hataw, kakasuhan ko sila.

“Sobrang luho nila,” he adds still visibly smarting. “Binigay ko na sa kanila ang lahat tapos ganyan lang ang gagawin nila sa akin?”

At this juncture, biglang tinapon sa basurahan ni Sir Jerry ang complimentary tickets na binigay sa kanya dahil buti na lang at di raw niya pinamigay, wala rin namang mauupuan.

What caught the ire of the good-natured Hataw tabloid publisher was the fact that he was almost ignored and barely acknowledged at the affair that his publication has sponsored and originated.

“Sila na nga ang kumita,” Sir Jerry hisses like a wounded snake, “tumulong pa ako sa mga sponsors tapos ginawa akong parang extra.

“Natatawa nga ako tuwing may bumabati sa akin. ‘Sir Jerry, successful ang affar!’ samantalang sila ‘yun. Di ako.”

Sang-ayon pa kay Sir Jerry, hindi raw siya impressed sa mga lalakeng sumali this year dahil karamihan ay mga bonzai beauties. Buti pa raw sa mga chicks, may 4 o limang may K.

Ganuned, Sir Jerry? Hakhakhak!

Anyway, the NPC president bemoaned the fact that he was supposedly ignominiously ignored while Joel Cruz went up the stage twice.

“Meron ng Mr. Aficionado,” he says in obvious reference to the king of scents Mr. Joel Cruz, “meron pang Mr. Joel Cruz.

“Magkano bang binigay nu’n sa kanila para itratong parang hari samantala ako na nagpasimula nang lahat ay halos hindi na mabanggit?

“Nakalimutan yata nilang ako ang nag-umpisa nang lahat ng ‘yan,” Sir Jerry says with barely controlled animosity. “Last year ko lang binigay sa kanila. Sabi ko, kayo na ang bahala riyan.

“Maski kumita pa sila ng isang milyon,” he bitingly says,” bahala na sila.

“Next year, gawin nilang Cesar Pambid Super Bodies.

“Imagine,” he asseverates,” para na lang akong one of the guests.

“Di pala,” he takes back his previous pronouncement, “parang ordinaryong manonood na lang ako.

“Pati nga mesang pina-reserve ko, pinaaalis pa si Vanni. Tama ba ‘yun?”

Oo nga naman.

Some people should know where credit is due.

Masyadong hurting nga naman ‘yung ikaw ang nagpasimula nang lahat tapos parang completely ay ini-ignore ka na dahil sa kung sinu-sinong nagbigay ng anda.

***

KAPAG nakikita namin lately ang teevee personality na ‘to na dati-rati’y problematic sa kanyang lovelife at talagang talk of the town ang mga nakalulukring na eksena sa kanyang former flame na member ng isang all-male band, mukhang she looks very much serene and at peace with the world already.

Why is that so?

Hindi na ba siya rumaratrat (rumaratrat daw, o! Hakhakhak!) kung kaya she’s back to her usual cool persona?

Dati-rati talaga, talk of the town ang kanyang paglalasing habang kumakatok-katok sa apartment ng kanyang musician na papa who’s not that good-looking but this woman seemed to fall head over heels in love with for some reasons that were highly sexual in nature. Hakhakhak!

How exceedingly cheap!

Napaka-dramatic pa nga ang eksena niya before dahil with matching rain effect pa habang may I pound galore siya sa pinto ng apartment habang obvious na bangag or lango sa alak. Hakhakhak!

But things are a lot different now. In the few occasions that we’ve seen her, she was obviously sober and very much in control of her emotions and was palpably in tip-top shape.

Ang totoo nga niyan ay nakagawa na raw siya ng isang sexy movie wherein she showed her wares for all the horny men to ogle at. Hakhakhak!

At any rate, the reason supposedly for her glowing persona lately is the presence of the new love of her life – a moneyed lesbo who used to be the lover of this young actress who’s now found her worthy match in the person of this brown-skinned hunk actor who has just come from a traumatic love affair.

Hakhakhakhakhak!

Minsan nga raw, mas okay pa ang kapwa mo babae (or lalake for that matter…Hakhak- hak!) dahil naiintindihan niya ang nararamdaman mo.

True ba ‘yun, Ate Vinia? Hakhakhak!

Ayaw ni Gary Sta. Ana nang ganyan. Hakhakhak!

***

KUNG BAKIT MAS NAGUSTUHAN NAMIN SI QUEENSTAR VI

Kahit saan kami magpunta lately, the perennial question is predictably the same. Wala na raw ba talagang chance na magbalik pa ang dating fondness namin for Super- star Nora Aunor?

Perpetually so, our answer has remained the same – we feel no animosity or repugnance for the superstar but the love we used to feel for her has been replaced with this thing called indifference.

Honestly, I will always admire her fabled acting virtuousity from afar but the fondness and reverential awe that I used to feel for her is now a thing of the past.

For right this very moment, my heart is already filled with enormous admiration for Queenstar Vilma Santos, who, for me, has shown the kind of recognition that Ms. Nora Aunor has failed to acknowledge.

Dios mio perdon! Di naman ako bagong tagahanga niya, I’ve been a fan for almostthree decades already, and yet I seemed to be a total stranger every time I would meet her. Hahahahahaha!

Funny but it’s true. Whatever fondness I used to norture in my heart for her has completely vanished on thin air because of her abominable indifference. Hahahahaha!

Jesus H. Christ! I’ve been hobnobbing with her for so many years at the numerous presscons and social events that we both attended and yet recognition seems to e- lude her every time we would meet. Hahahahaha!

Kabaliw, di ba naman?

My Mom, God bless her soul, was right after all when she told me when I was still young that I should not be treating Nora like a demi goddess for she was a human being just like anyone.

Anyhow, I have found the right person to idolize in Queenstar Vi for she’s really veritably exemplary.

80s palang when I was an avid and rabid Noranian, Queenstar Vi had already shown me what good breeding and poise were all about when I met her in one of the Regal films’ presscons that I attended where she patiently explained to me the salient point about one of her phsysical atrributes.

Through the years, she’s always been most consistent.

That perennially dazzling smile that has been her stock in trade in the business has never left her physiognomy every time we would meet inadvertently.

In a way, that must have been one of the reasons for her awesome success and un- matched staying power in the business.

Everything might not be turning out well with her world and it might be orbiting into a tizzy but Queenstar Vi has always had a ready smile for everyone.

Unlike Nora who’s only nice to the people she’s always known for the past 35 years or even more, Vilma is Ms. PR personified.

Eh, ano ba kung tawagin siyang plastic ng iba riyan? Mas masarap pa rin ang feelng ng isang taong nginingitian ng isang celebrity kaysa dini-deadma tulad ng gawain ni Aunor.

Period. Walang comma!

Totoong tao nga siguro siya in that respect but for me, that’s tantamount to being ill-bred.

Okay lang na deadmahin mo ‘yung ibang taong di mo naman talaga kilala, pero anak ng tokwa naman, 28 years mo na akong napagkikikita kung saan-saan, deadma ka pa rin at kung sinu-sinong mga panget at yosi-kadiri at mababaho ang hinahalikan mo at bini-beso.

Buhkittttt?

Kaya kung nawalan man ako nang gana kay Nora Aunor, dapat lang, noh?

Who does she think she is? God?

Tama na! Husto na!

Wala na akong kagana-gana.

My God! come to thik of it, mas bagay pala talaga akong magsasama kay Queenstar Vi dahil we have so many things in common.

Di ba naman, Ate Aida? Hakhakhak!

I don’t want to open my mouth anymore and hurl furher invectives, lest I allienate some dyed-in-the-wool Noranians all the more. Hakhakhakhakhak!

Basta ako, sa totoo lang at walang kaplastikan.

Why should I suffer truckloads of ignominy every time the superstar would ignore me when I’m even a lot more learned than she can ever hope to be? Hahahahaha!

In Queenstar Vi, I’ve seen someone who truly deserves to be admired.

Someone particular about the way she looks and with hygiene as well.

Hahahahaha!

Every time I look at her svelte body and flat tummy, I just know that this is the one I should be particularly devoted to.

Not someone who’s tummy is kind of bloated because of the absence of discipline.

Hahahahahahahaha!

Ayoko na! I’ve said more than a mouthful but I did not exaggerate one bit.

Anyhow, one of the reasons siguro of Ate Vi’s good complexion and good health is the fact that she never forgets to drink a glass of milk (not just any ordinary milk but Nestle’s Bear Brand no less) every day in between her veritably hectic working sched as Batangas governor.

***

STAND-OUT SI INA FELEO

I used to see her in some soaps produced by Abs Cbn but I never knew who she was until I attended the presscon for Ms. Marilou Diaz-Abaya’s soon to detonate movie in some cinemas titled Ikaw Ang Pag-ibig, wherein she happens to be one of the movie’s central character. Honestly, du’n lang namin nalamang anak pala siya ni Johnny Delgado (SLN) at direk Laurice Guillen.

Anyway, maigting ang pagganap ni Ms. Ina Feleo bilang kapatid ni Marvin Agustin (Father Johnny) who is afflicted with Acute Myelogenous Leukemia and is badly in need of bone marrow transplant.

Nasa crossroads si Ina (Vangie Cruz) rito dahil hindi niya madesisyonan kung papa- yag siyang maging donor ng kanyang kapatid na pari.

On top of that, naririyan din ang pressure ng kanyang boyfriend na si Dr. Joey Lucas (Jomari Yllana) na magpakasal na sila dahil meron na silang lovechild na dalawa.

Anyhow, in situations like this, they are naturally drawn to Ina (Nuestra Senora de Penafrancia) to whom they have prayed for divine intercession.

Little by little, it is Ina’s grace of conversion, love and forgivness that’s gi- ving Vangies’s family hope – the most important thing that we are all very much in need of.

A movie that nobody should miss, Ikaw Ang Pag-ibig opens on September 14 nationwide.

***

EUGENE’S MOST IMPRESSED WITH TONI’S PROFESSIONALISM

A week or so prior to the opening of her movie (Wedding Tayo, Wedding Hindi) with the talented Toni Gonzaga, we had the chance of talking with one of the hottest actresses of today Ms. Eugene Domingo at Star Cinema’s mini-presscon for her and director Joey Javier Reyes.

“She’s practically in my whole career!” gushingly states Direk Joey in obvious reference to the very talented comedic actress. “With Wendel and Zanjoe, it’s my first time.

“With Uge (Eugene), magkatinginan lang kami, nagkakaintindihan na.

“Nagulat lang ako kay Zanjoe,” he adds kind of shy and almost girlish. “‘Yung lumang magazine kasi wherein he was (photoraphed nude) on the cover, gusto ko sanang papirmahan sa kanya. Hahahahaha!

“I guess he’s one of the few versatile actors that we have in our midst,” he goes on stark raving.

“Honestly, when I look at him in person, I am all the more impressed.

“Bibihira kasi ang nasa kategorya niya na enjoy lumabas sa comedic shows like Babana Split.

“Madaling magpa-iyak ng mga tao pero ang magpatawa, mahirap gawin ‘yun.

“I guess he’s a natural comedian,” he further elaborates. “Malayo talaga ang mararating ni Zanjoe.”

On Eugene, he has this to say: “I believe time will come na magiging kasing ranggo  siya nina Ate Vi at Ate Guy,” he gushingly states. “Siya kasi ang aktres na kailan- ma’y di minamaliit ang anumang klase ng roles.

“She’s intelligent, professional, at na-exploit talaga ang kanyang immense poten- tials lalo na nang maging Simang siya sa TV.

“Stars come and go,” he asseverates, “but I believe Eugene Domingo will always be around to keep us entertained.

“It’s a rarity when you can find an artist that can be credible in every role that she plays.

“Indeed, Eugene Domingo is Eugene Domingo.

If famed director Jose Javier Reyes is palpably smitten with Eugene’s accomplish- ments, the latter has nothing but good words for Toni gonzaga’s purported intelli- gence, drive and financial expertise.

In all honesty, Ms. Eugene’s veritably impressed with Toni Gonzaga’s purely analy- tical mind.

“Magaling siya mag-analalyze ng mga bagay,” she avers. “Astute ang kanyang analysis sa nga networks, sa mga relasyon at conscious siya sa mga investments.

“Sabi niyan sa akin,’Ate Uge, bumili ako ng lupa sa ganito, ganyan, baka gusto mo rin?’

“She’s a very good adviser,” she goes on stark-raving. “Sa totoo, ang gaganda ng natutunan namin sa isa’t-isa.

“Like for example, sasabihin niyan sa akin, ang ballroom dancing nakapagpapaseksi raw ng galaw or body movements.

“Parang gusto ko na rin tuloy mag-yoga, mag-ballroom dancing. Hahahahaha!

“Si Toni ang babaeng walang di kayang gawin. Hahahahaha! At sobrang mahal na mahal ang pamilya.

“Ang nakatatawa, nagulat talaga kami na di pa pala siya nakapagta-travel mag-isa.

“In my case, gustung-gusto ko ‘yun.

“Sabi ko nga kay Toni, dapat gumawa ka ng mga bagay-bagay na wala sa ‘yong comfort zone.

“I’m not saying na magdiwara siya,” she emphasizes. “Just try to experience some- thing you haven’t done yet before you consider getting married.

Anyway, Wedding Tayo, Wedding Hindi is presently being shown in some 100 theaters nationwide.

Predictably so, with Ms. Eugene and Toni around, how could you expect it to fail?

Send in those sizzling stories that you know about our fave showbiz personalities at pete_ampoloquio@yahoo.com and #09994269588, #09053195407 and #09223870129 and read them here.

And with that, ito po ang kuya Pete ninyo na nagsasabing, Christopher, my son, I love you very, very much, my love for you goes beyond eternity.

Adios. Mabalos. I always need you, Nong!

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