Magaling talagang dumiskarte si ‘Nganga Queen’

KAHANGA-HANGA talaga ang husay ni Cristinelli Salazar Fermin, the undisputed tupperware queen of Philippine cinema, dahil inuunahan na kaagad niya si Ms. Nora Aunor sa maaaring gawin nito dahil na rin sa kanyang pagiging taling-harap at plastikada.

Imagine, she’s been doing one thousand and one diabolical things against the Superstar for the past two decades or so, but far from appearing as the villainess, sina-psy-war niya ito at pinalalabas na aggressor instead of becoming the aggrieved party.

Ang galing-galing di ba naman? Hakhakhak!

Today lumabas sa tabloid na pinagre-reynahan ng ngangaerang lomod na gusto raw ipatanggal ng aktres ang walang K na mag-host ng isang showbiz-oriented talkshow na matrona.

Really? Is that soooo? Hahahahahahaha!

Honestly, if Nora would want her kicked out of the Kapatid Network, she can very well do that. After all, she’s now the acknowledged queen out there.

But the mere fact that the syorak Ferminata is still hosting her rating-less shows at the said network more than attest to the veracity of the Superstar’s statement that she deosn’t have a modicum of an interest to have her kicked out of the network both of them are now working for.

Kung totoong pinamimili ni Ate Guy ang network sa kanilang dalawa, who, do you think, would they choose? Hakhakhak!

Negosyo ang teevee industry and so far, they have been most generous and considerate of her for the past one year or so.

Dapat ay walang sentimentalidad na pinaiiral sa ganyang larangan pero dahil na-master na nga ni Nganga Queen ang kaplastikan at pagsisipsep, nagawa niyang bilugin ang ulo ni Mr. Perci Intalan and she’s been able to hold on to her shows in spite of the the ‘lugi’ factor that TV5 has been experiencing since Ferminata has lorded it out at the showbiz department.

Laos na kasi at inaamag na sa kalumaan ang hosting style at matronang-matrona na ang arrive pero ayaw pa ring i-relinquish ang kanyang trono to give way to younger and fresher talents. Hakahakhakhakhak!

Magnganga ka na lang sa Parada, Valenzuela Bulacan, lola dahil doon ka nababagay. Hakhakhak!

Tungkol naman sa mga lihim daw ni Ate Guy na pinananakot nilang ibubulgar, puhlllleeezzzeeee! Mas karimarimarim ang mga lihim mo as compared sa kanya, noh?

‘Yung pagpatol mo na lang sa mga lalaking anak mo na lang halos ay very scoopy nang talaga, kumustahin mo pa ang mga lengua episodes mo at pompiyangan sa mga kapwa mo tibs? Hahahahahaha!

Nora Aunor has nothing to hide. Alam naman ng kanyang legions of followers ang kanyang mga diskarte sa buhay.

Pero ikaw, lola, nagpapakaipokrita ka pa gayung basang-basa na ang papel mo sa pagiging attact-and-collect, defend and collect mo.

Hahahahahahaha!

Nakahihiya ka, lola, lola ling, matandang plastikada’t may tililing! Hakhakhakhakhak!

***

Sikat na gandarang beauty queen, nadala na sa kanyang curly-curly hair chuva

IBA na ang kanyang hairing lately as compared to her kind of hair before that was curly and bouncy and kind of voluminous. Hakhakhak!

Obviously, nadala ang gandarang beauty queen nang magpunta siya sa isang lugar sa ka-Maynilaan at the height of typhoon Quiel at talaga namang nawindang (Hakhakhak!) as in totally ay nawalan ng bounce ang kanyang hair at nagmukha siyang basang-sisiw. Hahahahahahaha!

Kung glamorous at mala-Farrah Fawcett ang dating ng kanyang buhok when she arrived at the typhoon-infested area, in just a couple of minutes, her bouncy hairdo had been heavily buffeted by the wind and the rain, she came out as someone who’d been a veritable victim of rape by the wind.

Hahahahahahaha!

Kaya sa ngayon, she has ostensibly learned her lesson.

No more curly-curly hair chuva, super straight na ang kanyang hair galore para in the event nga namang biglang bumagyo at hanginin siya to-the-max, wala na siyang magiging problema. Hahahahahahahaha!

***

May dapat pa bang patunayan si Ate Vi?

DAHIL visible raw ngayon si Ms. Nora Aunor sa kanyang mga commitment sa TV5, may mga nagpo-foment na naman ng mga intriga to the effect that Queenstar Vilma Santos-Recto is purportedly feeling kind of being left behind because of the visibility of her kumare.

Honestly, Ate Vi is beyond pettiness already at this point in her career when she has been able to prove so many things already, both in the world of show business and politics as well.

Tulad nang madalas niyang sabihin sa kanyang interviews, “Eight years nawala si Mareng Guy, let’s all welcome her back!”

Rivalry at this point, she asseverates, is also welcome provided lalagyan naman nang konting maturity at huwag na ‘yung style nu’ng 70s na nagkakasakitan talaga ang mga fans.

“If it will make the industry healthy,” she avers in obvious reference to the kind of excitement that’s being generated by the renewed interest in both their respective careers by the entertainment press, “why not?”

Oo nga naman.

What is there to prove, anyway?

Queenstar Vi has been around for almost five decades and yet her kind of popularity has never been dimmed or diminished with the passing of time. Looks-wise, she still exudes beauty and class even when outfitted in the simplest of outfits and devoid of the usual glitz and glamor that her showbiz image demands.

Again, what is there to prove anyway?

She’s done it all. Has weathered tremendous storms in her showbiz and personal life as well and yet is still very much whole and feisty as ever in her own way.

There is only one Vilma Santos and she lives in the heart of every Filipino who has silently adored and loved her after all these years.

***

Engineer Manuel Pablico naiibang evangelist

MARAMI na rin kaming na-meet na mga so-called evangelist pero namumukod-tangi itong si Engineer Manuel Palico of the Divine Government of God, Inc.

He is not the kind of religious leader who thrives in milking rich members of their congregation by way of asking sizable amount of donations.

He is a very hardworking man and he bravely supports his congregation through sheer hard work.

Anyway, he intends to produce a movie with his own vision as guiding light and his loyal follower Direk Bing Santos will be directing it.

In the meantime, tuluy-tuloy ang kanyang occasional nightouts with his people at his pub house (Master’s Pub) along Mindanao Avenenue in Kyusi.

Doon ay walang religion na pinag-uusapan kundi nage-enjoy lang silang magsama-sama.

***

Zanjoe Marudo happy sa kanyang lovelife

KUNG blooming at perennially sexy ngayon si Bea Alonzo, credit should be given to her idyllic lovelife that’s devoid of the usual complications when you’re in this business.

Medyo matagal-tagal na rin naman kasi sila ni Zanjoe Marudo pero tipong smooth-sailing talaga ang kanilang relasyon. Pa’no, a man of few words kasi ang paparu niya kaya naman happiness is perennially etched on her face these days.

Wala ka nga namang hahanapin pa with this soft-spoken guy who exudes coolness and self-possession even when under pressure.

Dapat lang!

***

Dedma na dahil umariba na ang machine gun ng kalaban niya

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Kung dati’y palaban ang mga dialogs ng dating aktres na may dalawang anak na nag-aartista, this time she seems to have found enough reason to clam up and her keep her mouth shut.

Why is that so?

Simple lang, palaban ang manager na kaeksena niya at syokot siyang ibulgar nito ang kanyang mga sekeletons sa kanyang closet particularly ang sandamakmak niyang pagkakautang particularly ‘yung housing loan na 100K per month na ang pangbayad ay nang-gagaling sa talent fees.

On top of that, may jewelry loan din daw ang kontrobersyal na personalidad amounting to a cool one hundred fity thousand pesos na up to now ay ini-ignore lang nito at di binabayaran.

‘Yun na!

***

Ms. Claire dalawang taon ng tinitira ng isang radio & TV personality na may AC/DC image

ARAW-ARAW ay tinitira ng kunwari ay prim and proper radio and teevee personality na ‘to si Ms. Claire dela Fuente dahil sa two years ago, nasagasaan daw ng bus ng company nito ang anak ng kanyang kumpare na inudyukan daw nitong magdemanda at humingi ng damages amounting to a cool P8.5 million.

Sa halip na ‘yung corporation lang ang idemanda, pati ‘yung limang incorporators ay dinamay nila sa damages.

“Pati ari-arian ko iniimbestigahan para sa pwedeng i-attach sa kaso,” Ms. Claire asseverates.

“Magmula rin noon,” the famed singer avers, “tinitira ako sa radyo araw-araw sa loob ng dalawang taon.”

On top of that, pini-pressure rin daw ng sikat na broadcaster ang mga nakaupo sa gobyerno para gawan siya nang masama, tulad ng kanselahan ng franchise, ang manager nina Sam Pinto at Bela Padilla.

“Maski petty things lang,” Ms. Claire intones, “pinalalaki niya.

“Ganon siya ka-vindictive o baka dahil sa perang makukuha ng kumpare niya.

“AC/DC raw ‘yan sabi ng iba,” she opines. “Tira nang tira para magkapera.

“Kawawa naman ako,” she intimates. “Para bang ako ‘yung pumatay sa anak ng kumpare niya e, accident nga ‘yun…sino ba’ng may gusto nu’n?

“Grabe ‘yan sa pagkawalanghiya!” she says with ostensible repugnance. “Feeling niya, Diyos siya!

“Ang masama, pini-pressure pati gobyerno. Maski sino maupo para tirahin ako.

“Kaya minsan, nagkakaproblema ako.”

Well, we have the so-called due process of the law to protect every individual in this country. Sana’y tigilan na ng personalidad na ‘to si Ms. Claire dahil di naman nito ginusto ang mga pangyayari.

Matakot ka naman sa Diyos, pare ko. She is just but a hardworking entity just like all of us. Iba na lang ang kotongan mo at huwag na siya.

‘Yung mga totoong nahihiga sa salapi at huwag ‘yang ganyang nagbabanat lang nang buto para mabuhay.

Huwag mo kasing ginagamit ang medium mo para makapangharbat ng datung dahil hindi ‘yan kagandahan.

Kuha mo, pare?

Spare her. She’s not half as rich as you imagined her to be.

‘Yun lang!

***

Dangal ng OPM Awards, tampok sa OPM Fair 2011

MAHIGIT sa 30 batikang mang-aawit at tagpagtaguyod ng Original Pinoy Music ang nominado sa kauna-unahang Dangal ng OPM Awards na iginagawad ng Organisasyon ng Pilipinong Mang-aawit (OPM).

Ang parangal ay ibinibigay sa mga nabubuhay na OPM singers at artist-icons ng Philippine Music Industry na nakapag-ambag sa pagkilala, pagpapalaganap at pagpapaunlad ng Original Pinoy Music sa loob ng 25 taon. Pararangalan ang mga nagwagi sa pagbubukas ng OPM Fair 2011 sa Oktubre 11, 8:00 ng umaga sa Quezon Memorial Circle sa Quezon City.

“Mula sa mahigit 100 nominees na deserving namang lahat, pipili ang OPM Board of Directors ng mga natatanging OPM artists na nagsimula at patuloy na sumisimbolo sa kagalingan ng Original Pinoy Music. Exciting ito kasi 25 years na ngayon ng OPM organization at nararapat lamang kilalanin ang mga nag-umpisa at nagtaguyod nito,” pahayag ni OPM President Ogie Alcasid.

Sang-ayon si OPM Secretary Dingdong Avanzado na punong-abala sa OPM Fair 2011 Organizing Committee. “First time ito sa industriya ng Musikang Pinoy. Hindi lamang mga solo artists ang pararangalan kundi maging mga banda o grupo na nagpasikat ng OPM sound mula pa noong 1960s hanggang sa kasalukuyan.”

May temang “Ang Himig Natin Noon at Ngayon,” ang OPM Fair 2011 ang pinakamalaking pagtitipon ng mga mang-aawit at musikerong Pinoy. Buong araw na selebrasyon ang bubuksan sa publiko na walang bayad. Magkakaroon ng paglulunsad at bentahan ng mga music CDs sa murang halaga, pagtatanghal ng mga bago at batikang mang-aawit, banda, rondalla, at sayaw sa himig ng OPM, mga booths ng mga ahensya ng gobeyerno na pang- serbisyo-publiko, at isang gala concert sa gabi na magtatampok sa mga hinahangaan at bigating mang-aawit at banda.

Sa pakikipagtulungan nina Senador Francis “Kiko” Pangilinan at Mayor Herbert Bautista, nilalayon ng proyekto na lalong palaganapin ang suporta ng publiko at media sa Original Pinoy Music at itaguyod ang kapakanan ng mga mang-aawit at musikong Pinoy. Suportado rin ang proyekto ng Armed Forces of the Philippines, PAGCOR, Puregold, Tanduay, Dr. Vicky Belo, Intel Philippines at WAVE Sound and Music Company.

“Inaasahan namin ang mainit na pagtanggap ng publiko sa ating sariling musika at mang-aawit sa pamamagitan ng OPM Fair 2011 na magpapakita rin ng pagkakaisa ng mga producer, music talents at iba pang kabalikat sa industriya ng Musikang Pinoy. Nagpapasalamat kami sa suporta nina Senador Kiko at Mayor Herbert sa proyektong ito,” dagdag pa ni Alcasid.

Ang OPM Board of Directors ay binubuo nina Ogie Alcasid, president; Noel Cabangon, vice president for external affairs; Gary Valenciano, vice president for internal affairs; Christian Bautista, vice president for special projects; Dingdong Avanzado, secretary; Jose Mari Chan, treasurer; at Mitch Valdes, chairman.

Para sa iba pang detalye, maaaring makipag-alam sa OPM Secretariat sa website na http://opm.org.ph, Tel. 5765069 o e-mail opmsingers@gmail.com.

***

Send in those sizzling stories that you know about our fave showbiz personalities at pete_ampoloquio@yahoo.com and #09994269588, #09276557791 and #09223870129 and read them here.

And with that, ito po ang kuya Pete ninyo na nagsasabing, Christopher, my son, I love you very, very much, my love for you goes beyond eternity.

Adios. Mabalos. I always need you, Nong!

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