Mas macho pa ang girl compared sa papa

HAHAHAHA! How so very amusing naman ang drama ng dalawang magdyowang ito na sumali sa isang reality show ng isang network.

Palihim na nangagsisipagtawanan ang mga ombreng kasama nila roon dahil mas astig pa raw ang arrive nu’ng girlalu compared sa kanyang papa.

This is not to say na the guy (who’s hunky and delectably astig in all his masculine glory…Hahahahaha!) is not a veritable macho.

He is. It so happened that he was born rich and was used to the amenities of wealth and opulence, the surroundings in that island was totally repugnantly anathema in as far as he was concerned. Hahahahahaha!

Papano naman, ipinanganak with a silver spoon on his mouth tapos biglang dadalhin mo sa isang miserableng kapaligiran kung saan kinakailangan niyang mamuhay nang parang isang Japanese straggler? Hahahahaha!

Ang ending, nagdesisyon siyang magbabu na silang magmama bago mawalan siya ng erection dahil sa kawalan ng maayos na lafetch at matutulugan.

Sanay nga naman siya sa kapaligirang esekola kaya nawala talaga ang kanyang libido dahil sa sobrang na-stress out dahil sa iba’t ibang challenges na pinagagawa sa kanila. Hahahahahahaha!

Imagine, nag-panic daw talaga ang ombre nang tipong hindi na siya magkaroon ng erection gayung nasa tabi naman niya ang kanyang sariwa, maganda at makatas na girlfriend. Hahahahahaha!

Ang ending, nag-voluntary exit na sila dahil ang feeling ni papa’y kapag nagtagal pa raw sila roon, baka maging impotent na siya. Hahahahahahaha!

Sayang naman daw ang kadakuan (kadakuan daw, o! Hakhakhak!) ni papa kung maaapektuhan ng mga depressing happenings sa isla. Hahahahahahahaha!

‘Yun na!

***

Naloka si Ferminata sa closeness nina MVP at Ate Guy

HAHAHAHAHA! Kapraning ang drama raw nitong si Lola Ferminata na nakatutok talaga ang mga nanlilisik at insekuridang mga mata habang buong ningning na nagbebeso-beso at nagtsitsikahan sa pabolosang NBC Tent ang Superstar na si Nora Aunor at ang hari ng TV5 na si Mr. Manny Pangilinan a couple of days ago.

Masinsinan daw kasi ang pag-uusap ng dalawa kaya kinakabog ang dibdib ng insecure na lola. Hakhakhak! Akala raw kasi ng matronang inaamag na ang hosting style ay ipinatanggal na siya ng aktres sa TV5. Hahahahahahaha!

Indeed, a guilty conscience needs no accuser.

Did I hit the nail right on its head, lola?

“Matagal kasi ang bulungan nu’ng dalawa kaya na-stress out si Ferminata,” so says our source. “Buong akala kasi niya’y ipinatatanggal na siya ng aktres.”

Hakhakhak!

“Sa totoo lang naman, si Ferminata ang matindi ang insecurity kay La Aunor dahil kahit saan daanin, no match naman siya sa accomplishments nito na na-feature pa sa HBO kasama ‘yung iba pang greatest actresses of Asia.

“Sayang nga lang at di siya kagalingan kung paghawak ng pera ang pag-uusapan.

Pero mabait ang Diyos sa kanya dahil binigyan pa siya ng isa pang pagkakataon by way of MVP’s TV5.”

Oo nga naman.

Anyway, kay Ferminata pa rin, ito raw ang nakasisira sa TV5. Kung pera ang pag-uusapan, there is no doubt that they are sufficiently loaded.

‘Yun nga lang, nagiging wah epek ang machinery nila dahil ang frontliner ay ang lolang AC/DC na si Ferminata na epitome of AC/DC writing and payola kaya so-so lang ang nagiging arrive nila.

Hahahahahahahaha!

Going back to Nora, maraming magagandang ala-ala sa kanya ang kanyang mga tagasubaybay nu’ng time na umi-ere pa ang kanyang Superstar show na tumagal ng mahigit dalawang dekada.

“‘Yung lola ko rati,” recalls Jhun Talagtag, an avid Noranian who happens to be our kababayan from Bicol, “palibhasa’y mahirap pa kami sa daga, para makauwi sa Bicol maduman (pumupunta) ‘yan sa show ni Nora, yayakapin lang niyan ang idol niya, solved! May 2k na ang lola ko.

“Good memories samo (sa amin) ‘yan.

“‘Yung mga tugang (kapatid) ko na Noranians na based na ngayon sa US, sinda (sila) ang nag-introduce sako (sa akin) saimo (sa’yo).

“Aki (bata) pa ako (Hahahahahahaha! okray!) nababasa na kita sa harong (bahay).

“Natuwa sinda (sila) nang binareta (binalita) ko na nasa Remate ka na.

“Nu’ng mag-uruli (nu’ng umuwi), hinanap tulos (agad) ang Remate na ‘yan sa airport.

“I told them Vilmanians ka na, (Hahahahaha!) para sindang namatayan.

“Pero nang sabihin kong Noranian pa rin ‘yan, nagtatampo lang, natuwa naman sila.”

Well, I will always respect Nora’s lofty accomplishments in the world of show business from afar.

But Vilma’s such a good-natured person, it’s hard not to fall for her dripping with honey charm.

Siguro na-outgrow ko na lang ang blind idolatry na nakagisnan ko noon.

Inasmuch as I still love to watch Ate Guy emoting before the cameras, I’m positively ensnared with the Queenstar’s very positive aura and innate sweetness.

Anyway, tomorrow (December 7) is the Voices, Songs & Rhythm in Batangas.

To be hosted by Luis Manzano and Ruffa Gutierrez and with Ogie Alcasid as chairman of the board, it’s guaranteed to be a night of songs and excitement and entertainment.

***

Off-line na agad?

MARAMI ang na-intriga nang tumanggap ng Diamond album award sa ASAP Rocks last Sunday ang lead vocalist ng Spongecola na si Yael Yuson.

Imagine, binati o pinasalamatan niya ang kung sinu-sino pero surprisingly, Karylle was not a part of it.

Buhkittttt? Off-line na ba agad? Hahahahahahaha!

Nag-go lang sa Singapore para mag-taping ng isang musical tapos pagbalik ay cold as the weather in Alaska raw ang turingan nila sa isa’t isa?

How shocking! Hahahahahahahaha!

Kunsabagay, it’s all for the best daw ang nangyari dahil mukhang hindi naman daw sila nababagay sa isa’t isa.

At any rate, it’s still a commendable achievement. Ang makabenta ka ng 150,000 units these days ay isang gigantic accomplishment considering how hard money is to come by these days.

***

Malamang mag-off-line kapag sumikat nang husto ang gwaping na sexy actor

NAKITA namin for the first time ang naanakang starlet ng isang dating male starlet na ngayo’y leading man material na sa network na kanyang nilipatan.

Hindi naman siya panget actually. May charm naman’

‘Yun nga lang, kulang siya sa sekswalidad (she looks flat and kind of plebeian).

Her legs are not gorgeously shaped and her face somewhat too common for comfort, I have this feeling that in a year or two, she is going to part ways with her live-in lover.

Sa takbo ng mga pangyayari, magiging much sought-after na leading man ang kanyang ‘asawa’ at doon na papasok ang complications.

I just hope though that it’s not going to happen if only for their kid’s sake.

***

Ace Castro marami ang nagtilam-tilam

KAKAIBA ang freshness at succulence ng indie sexy actor na si Ace Castro na pinagpantasyahan ng mga bading sa hot indie flick na “Lamog” na pinalabas sa mga indie outlets May of this year.

Dahil bago palang sa larangan ng paghuhubad (paghuhubad daw, o! Hakhakhak!), tigasin pa ang baguhang indie actor.

Memorable para sa kanyang mga fans ang churvahan scenes nila ng sexpot na si Maui Taylor.

Wish lang ng kanyang mga fans ay ma-penetrate naman daw ng kanilang idolo ang mainsteam filmmaking.

Take a look at his sturdy body and be the judge.

***

Tarugs ng dating sikat na sexy actor wala nang arrive

HAHAHAHAHA! What a pity naman for this not-so-young hunk. At the height of his fame as one of tinsel town’s hottest sexy actors, he was admittedly receiving lots of offers from sex-starved matrons and libidinous gays.

At that time, 150 grand was a big sum and he was being offered that much for a one-night stand.

During that time, he was driving around town in the most expensive makes of cars and was positively loaded.

But that was more than a decade ago and he’s now kind of wasted and no longer fresh, he already settles for a measly five thousand pesos so as to be able to maintain his casino addiction.

Kawawa naman.

Ang latest, gusto raw sana niyang maging ‘mama’ ang isang gay billionaire who’s into the teevee network business but the latter seems not to be that interested.
Hahahahahahahaha!

‘Yan ang problema kapag osla ka na at patang-pata na ang hitsura mo.

Men and gays are no longer that interested specially so now that he has considerably aged and is not half as succulent as he was before.

***

Send in those sizzling stories that you know about our fave showbiz personalities at pete_ampoloquio@yahoo.com and #09994269588, #09276557791 and #09223870129 and read them here.

And with that, ito po ang kuya Pete ninyo na nagsasabing, Christopher, my son, I love you very, very much, my love for you goes beyond eternity.

About Thor

You must be logged in to post a comment Login

Leave a Reply