Na-shock ang mga bading sa asking price ng osla ng hubadero (hahahahaha!)

AMUSING naman ang nangyari sa ‘booking’ career ng osla ng hubadero na dati-rati’y hot na hot sa mga vaklushi dahil sa kanyang formidable equipment (formidable equipment daw, o! Hakhakhak!).

Dati, walang ka-effort-effort na nabu-‘booked’ siya sa mga bading dahil may name siya at pantasya ng mga claving during that time.

Hahahahahahaha!

But things are a lot different now that he’s no longer young and not that visible anymore in the movies.

He tried the Japan route as an entertainer during the late 90s but things did not turn out well and he tried staging a comeback in the movies during the early part of 2003 and 2004 but things did not turn out well.

Inasmuch as he still had the body for it and was adequately appealing, his fans were no longer interested to see him baring on cam for their eyes were already focused on and riveted to the new breed of hubaderos who were a lot younger and more succulent and appetizing.

How pathetic!

Ang nakalulungkot, di nakapag-ipon si kuya during his heyday as the bold actor to beat kaya naman pumapayag na siya sa mga booking fee na way, way below his former asking price.

How sad!

Ang kaso, nangingilabot ang mga suki niya sa kanyang fee dahil ‘di naman sila kayamanan tulad ng mga supsuperong (supsupero raw, o! Hahahahahaha!) customer rati ni Kuya. Hahahahahaha!

Kung 2k raw ay puwede ng pag-ipunan pero ang 8k na kanyang asking price ay mahirap daw ma-afford.

Hahahahahahaha!

So nakahahabag naman ever!

Anyway, ngangalisag daw ang balahibo ng bading nang sabihin ng oslang hubadero na 8k per hada (8k per hada raw, o! Hakhakhak!) ang fee niya ever. Hakhakhak!

Ang dapat sigurong hanapin niya ay mga vaklung na madadatung.

Ang kaso, would they still be interested to fellate his admittedly huge but not-so-succulent dick anymore? Hahahahahahaha!

That’s the $64 question that needs to be answered. Hahahahahaha! Dakota nga siguro siya, ang kaso tipong patang-pata na at walang kabuhay-buhay ang kanyang nota. Hahahahahahahahaha!

‘Yun na!

Hahahahahahahaha!

***

Feel na feel ang Remate

IBA talaga ang arrive ng ating Remate tabloid Ma’am Lydia.

Imagine, as far as Malilipot, Albay ay ang tabloid natin ang humahataw at sentimental fave nang nakararami.

“Totoo ‘yan, Pete,” avers former actress Margie Sakai who’s now the reigning councilor of her home-town Malilipot Albay. “Nang lumabas ‘yung write-up mo sa akin, hanap ako nang hanap pero tatlo na lang ang nabili ko.”

Kahit daw sa radio station kung saan may program sila ng sidekick niyang si Rodel Brotamonte alias Mata ng Bayan, talagang ang tabloid natin ang paboritong basahin dahil balanse ang laman nito. Hahahahahahaha!

“I think kahit mga radio people ay Remate rin ang gustong basahin,” avers our broadcaster friend.

Anyway, Margie doesn’t have any plan to go back to Manila or in Japan (Funabashi Shibaken).

“Mas tahimik ako rito sa atin,” she asseverates. “Bukod sa sariwa ang simoy ng hangin, kahit mga pagkain ay presko at maganda sa katawan.”

So far, she’s into gardening too and she loves it when the vegetables she’s planted start to grow and vegetate well.

So far, seryoso siyang pagbutihin ang kanyang political career, not so much for the financial remuneration but more so on emotional fulfillment.

“Naging mabait sa akin ang Diyos, Pete,” she intones. “Gusto ko namang ibalik sa Kanya ang mga blessings na binigay Niya sa atin by way of helping people through public service.”

Oo nga naman.

Goodluck, my dear.

Mabait ka naman kaya nakasisiguro akong God is always with you.

***

Babaeng tuod ang dating (hahahaha!)

MAGANDA naman siya at makinis ang kanyang balat.

May talent din siya sa hosting at magaling na komedyante. Ang kaso, she seems to be very much wanting of sex appeal that’s why her lovelife appears to be uneventful and boring. Hahahahahahaha!

May nagustuhan siyang singer/actor before but their relationship didn’t flourish or last that long for the simple reason that he purportedly find her boring and devoid of any kind of excitement. Hakhakhak!

In short, kulang sa appeal si Ate dahil ang mas nakaa-appreciate lang sa kanya ay ‘yung mga vaklush na kanyang nakakasama at kaharutang madalas. Hahahahaha!

Bagama’t maganda at kinisera, kulang kasi sa korte ang katawan, she needs to use pads (pads raw, o! Hahahahahaha!) by way of wearing maong shorts (would you believe Hakhakhak!) as undergarment to give the illusion of fullness.

Hahahahahaha!

Gayahin kaya niya si Rufa Mae na nagpa-inject ng collagen sa kanyang butt. Hakhakhak!

If there’s one thing that men find palpably unappealing, it’s women who are devoid of any contour and are mannish when devoid of any make-up. Hahahahahahaha!

Now, you know why this young woman has remained unattached in spite of her being most available to men from all stripes. Hahahahahahahaha!

***

Ace Castro and Ruth Russel sizzling hot!

THEY are not popular actors and actresses from the mainstream department but when you speak of indie movies, they have considerable following.

So far, hit galore ang kanilang Lamog (Bruised) dahil sa mga eksena nilang no-holds-barred talaga kaya naman marami ang na-el. Hakhakhak!

Marami raw ang na-el, o! Hahahahahaha!

For one, flawless naman kasi ang skin tone ng dalawang ito and both of them exude youth the natural way.

Just look at their photo. and be the judge.

Bawal magtikol! Hahahahahahahaha!

***

Lalong humuhusay ang acting!

DATI-RATI, parang ham actress kung ituring nang nakararami itong si Jewel Mische.

Para naman kasing walang kabuhay-buhay at so-so lang ang arrive.

But lately, she seems to have come out from the cocoon of her coy and timid self. Palaban na siya at bonggacious umarte as proven in the latest episodes of Maria La del Barrio kung saan villainess ang kanyang papel sa character ni Erich Gonzales.

Kung ganyan nang ganyan ang kanyang magiging portrayal sa kanyang mga succeeding soap operas, nakasisiguro kaming she’s going to become one of the actresses worth watching for at the Kapamilya network.

Mapanonood nga pala ang Maria La del Barrio bago mag-TV Patrol.

***

Pagkatapos kay Kim Chiu, si Ai-Ai naman!

MUKHANG tuluy-tuloy na ang showbiz career ng Queenstar for all seasons na si Gov. Vilma Santos Recto. Heto ka’t hindi pa nga natatapos ang The Healing nila ni Kim Chiu, may nilulutong follow-up project na kaagad ang Star Cinema para sa kanya.

Ms. Malu Santos hopes to pair off Ate Vi with the comedy queen Ms. Ai-Ai dela Alas in a comedy movie that will be directed by Wenn de Ramas.

According to our source, there’s a big possibility that this movie is going to be Star Cinema’s entry for the Metro-Manila Film Festival this 2012.

How nice! I’m sure the Vilmanians all over the land would rejoice with the possibility of seeing Ate Vi doing a movie for the MMFF after many years of not having any festival entry at all for she had solely focused her energy on her thriving political career.

Anyway, a few days ago, she, along with BM Boy Rosales and Dra. Rose Ozaeta, graced the groundbreaking ceremony of the new Phil. Red Cross-Batangas Building donated by Senator Ralph Recto, along with two ambulances from Sen. Richard Gordon.

Kita n’yo naman, di lang si Ate Vi ang nagmamahal sa Batangas. Senator Ralph Recto is also doing his own share of charity and public service.

Kuha n’yo mga intrigero? Hahahahahahaha!

‘Yun na!

***

Send in those sizzling stories that you know about our fave showbiz personalities at pete_ampoloquio@yahoo.com and #09994269588, #09276557791 and #09223870129 and read them here.

And with that, ito po ang kuya Pete ninyo na nagsasabing, Christopher, my son, I love you very, very much, my love for you goes beyond eternity.

loading...

About Thor

You must be logged in to post a comment Login

Leave a Reply