Dating hunk sa TV parang lumiit at lumamya ang dating

SOMETIMES, television can  be pretty deceiving.

More than two years ago, almost on a nightly basis ay pinanonood namin ang promising young hunk na ‘to on teevee. During that time, hunk na hunk ang kanyang dating at obvious na nagwo-workout siya kaya bonggacious ang kanyang muscles at fabulous abs. Hahahahaha!

He was being linked then with an equally young newcomer who moved out of the network and is presently doing well at the teevee station she chose to move in and ultimately become an integral part of.

Our hunky guy was not half as lucky. After a couple of teevee guesting, he simply vanished into oblivion and nothing much was heard about him.

Until a couple of nights ago, bigla ko siyang na-meet sa isang sosyal na okasyon.

At first, I didn’t recognize him coz he looked kinda different.

But after a while, medyo tinitigan ko siya dahil parang he looked familiar.

Tapos sinabi nu’ng host na before raw ay nag-artista siya.

Well, it was only then I was able to recognize him.

Oo nga. Siya ‘yung nightly ay napanonood ko on teevee sa isang reality show pero nag-iba ang hitsura niya dahil bagets look na siya now, a lot slimmer at di naman pala katangkaran unlike when I would see him nightly on national teevee.

Pero ang ikinagulat namin ay ang body movements niya.

Parang….hahahahahahaha!

Huwag na nga lang! Hahahahahahaha! Baka naman mali lang kami.

Baka raw mali lang kami, o! Hakhakhak!

Fill in the blanks na lang.

I might be wrong naman kasi kaya huwag na lang.

Huwag na lang daw, o! Hahahahahahahaha!

o0o

Mas naunang na-offer-an ng indie movie si Ate Vi bago si Mama Guy!

ALIVE na naman ang rivalry sa pagitan nina Queenstar Vilma Santos at Superstar Nora Aunor.

Sa isang radio show, pinagtawanan daw ang Burlesk Queen movie ni Ate Vi dahil mas bongga raw ang CNN movie ni Nora, whatever it was.

Honestly, inasmuch as Ms. Nora Aunor happens to be a consummate actress, it’s an unassailable fact that Governor Vi’s Burlesk Queen is safely considered as a veritable work of art of Direk Celso Ad Castillo when he was at his prime as a director.

‘Yung mga baklang guests sa radio show na ‘yun ay pinagtatawanan daw ang obra maestra ni Celso Kid that was made at a time when his name alone would quarantee long queues of people at the box-office.

Kumbaga, box-office na, pang-award pa.

Saan ka pa?

Maliban sa Burlesk Queen ni Celso Ad, classic din ang Sister Stella L ni Ate Vi na humakot talaga ng katakot-takot na awards at recognitions.

Dekada 70 was another award-winning movie by another gifted director.

Reputasyon by Ishmael Bernal made a killing at the box-office and was widely accepted by the critics as well.

Kaya magdahan-dahan sila nang pagmamaliit sa acting capabilities ng isang Vilma Santos dahil hindi siya isang type actress na maituturing kundi versatility personified.

Bago kasi mag-comment, be sure that you know what you’re hinting at or talking about.

Mga boobita bumblebee! Hahahahahaha!

‘Yun  lang!

o0o

In defense of Annabelle Rama

ELOQUENT si Ruffa Gutierrez nang idepensa niya ang ina niyang si Madam Annabelle Rama laban sa mga akusasyon dito ni Nadia Montenegro.

“My mom had to fight for what she believes in,” she asseverates. “Contrary to what other people believe, marunong din siyang masaktan but she tries to put up a brave front most of the time.

“Kung may nasabi man siyang masasakit,” points out the star of the Regal movie The Mommy Returns that’s slated to detonate in some giant cinemas on May 9, “sinabi ‘yun ng nanay ko to defend herself.”

Kung naging protective man daw siya towards her dad, it’s simply because her mom is capable of fending off intrigues on her own unlike her dad who’s a man of few words.

“Siyempre I got sad and emotional because my dad happens to be a very private person and he’s the best dad any -one can ever have!” she avers.

“My mom is a fighter at kaya naman niya ang mga intrigang dumarating sa kanya.

“My dad is mabait,” she points out methodically. “Walang tinatapakang tao.”

Say that with more conviction, dear. Hahahahahahahaha!

Anyway, marami na ang nag-aabang sa My Mommy Returns kung saan magkakatambal for the very first time sina Pokwang at Gabby Concepcion. Mother’s Day presentation ito ng Regal films kaya May 9 na ang showing nito.

o0o

Diamond-studded gold insignia ring ng dating beauty queen gustong dekwatin ng hangap na showbiz personality

HAHAHAHAHA! Maraming taon na ang nakalilipas pero may trauma pa rin pala ang isang aging beauty queen sa dek waterang showbiz personality na walang breeding at kahihiyan talaga kung pandedekwat ng mga gamit ng mga celebrities ang pag-uusapan. Hahahahahaha!

Imagine, ‘yun palang insignia ring na regalo sa beauty queen nang manalo siya sa isang prestigious international beauty competition ay hiniram lang daw ng lolang ito minsang mag-meet sila ng intelligent beauty queen sa isang showbiz function on the pretext na titingnan lang niya ang singsing ng noo’y kapapanalo palang halos na beauty queen pero nang kukunin na raw nito ang kanyang ring ay ayaw nang ibigay ng dekwaterang walang breeding na matanda.

Hakhakhak! How gross!

And soooo kapaaaalllllll! Hahahahahahaha!

Akala siguro ng bruhitic (Hahahahaha! does it rhyme with the word itik? mukhang pato kasi ang tanders na i-tetch..Hahahahaha!) ay makalulusot siya.

Ang hindi niya alam, bukod sa veritably expensive ang ring, the sentiments that go with it is admittedly priceless.

Hahahahahahaha!

Buti na lang at present sa nasabing okasyon ang leading ng beauty queen na in-order-an ang switik (switik daw, o! what an obnoxious terminology but it veritably fits the dekwatic gurang to a T! Hahahahahahaha!) na tanderaketch to return the precious ring to the beauty queen. Hahahahahahaha!

Anyway, it’s been decades since that incident happened but the beauty queen is still admittedly repulsed at the obnoxious personality of this old hag of a woman. Hahahahahahaha!

Chhheeeeeeaaapppppp!

o0o

Kish Mcbride katilam-tilam

HIS smile, along with his ‘huggable’ physique makes him a veritable winner in most talent search for men.

Winner lang naman siya bilang Mr. Heatwave of the year 2008 and the year after that, win na naman siya sa annual Hataw Super Bodies Bikini Open 2009.

So far, wala yata siyang sinalihang talent search na hindi siya nanalo kaya the ‘conteseros’ are fast becoming wary of his persona. Hahahahahaha!

Pag na-sight na kasi nila si kuya, knowing nilang lost na ang mga beauties o kamachuhan nila ever. Hahahaha!

Savor his innocent sexy look mga tol! (Mga tol daw, o! Hakhakhak!)

As always, bawal magtikol! hahahahahahaha!

o0o

Kakontemporaryong aktres parang lola na ng eskalera pa rin ang beauty na si Eula Valdez

HAHAHAHAHA! Sa tuwing mapanonood namin on teevee ang dati-rati’y gandarang brown-skinned actress na ‘to na minsang pinag-usapan sa show business dahil pinamalita nitong ang anak daw niya’y anak ng isang sikat na action star who was gentleman enough not to put her to shame and admittedly that what she said was true, we would feel nothing but pity for what she has become.

Samantalang ang contemporary niyang si Ms. Eula Valdez of the top-rating soap Mundo Man ay Magunaw ay kinukuha pang maging cover girl ng isang pinagpipitaganang English mag tulad ng FHM, ni sa inside pages ay hindi na tatanggapin ang babaeng ito.

Hahahahahahahaha!

That is what vanity can do to a person in a most positive sense.

Kita n’yo naman si Eula, twenty something lang ang paparu and the guy is basically besotted to her kind of enduring beauty. Hahahahahahaha!

Eh, ang girlalu na itetch, do you think she’s capable of hooking a man who’s only in his mid-20s? Hahahahaha!

Mundo Man ay Magunaw (Monday thru Friday after It’s Showtime at ABS CBN), hinding-hindi mangyayayri ‘yun ever! Hahahahahahaha!

Period. Ayoko ng lola! Hahahahahahahaha!

***

Send in those sizzling stories that you know about our fave showbiz personalities at pete_ampoloquio@yahoo.com and #09994269588, #09276557791 and #09223870129 and read them here.

And with that, ito po ang kuya Pete ninyo na nagsasabing, Christopher, my son, I love you very, very much, my love for you goes beyond eternity.

Adios. Mabalos. I always need you, Nong!

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