Sikat na TV personality nakabuntis daw ng chick pero ayaw pakasalan!

HURTING daw ang isang miyembro ng INC (Iglesia Ni Cristo) dahil nabuntis raw ito ng isang sikat na rin namang tevee personality pero ayaw raw nitong panagutan ang kanyang indiscretion.

Nu’ng una, madalas raw ang kanilang mating, I mean, meeting pala.

Hahahahahaha!

Ang kaso, when the guy allegedly learned of the woman’s purported pregnancy, he seems to have had a change of heart.

Dati raw kasi, regular talaga ang kanilang mating, este, meeting sessions. Ang kaso, nang matuklasan nga ng brown-skinned, balbonic teevee host na in that interesting stage na ang chick na regularly ay nachu-churva niya, bigla na lang daw itong nagbabu at di na nagparamdam since then.

Hahahahahahahaha!

Akala ko pa naman gentleman ang lalaking ito na rumored na bisexual. Hahahahahahaha!

Na-shock kaya siya at nakabuntis pala siya kaya in hiding na siya at mukhang wala nang interes na makipagkita pa sa chick na before ay in the mood daw siyang churvahin?

Oh, well, be a gentleman kuya. Baka ikaw ang maireklamo kay Tulfo kapag di mo ito inayos o gawan nang paraan. Hahahahahahaha!

Pasalamat ka nga raw at pinaniwalaan ka nu’ng girl mereseng may tsikang AC/DC ka ever.
AC/DC in the sense na puwede sa boy at puwede rin sa girl. Hahahahahaha!

True ba ito, bro? Hahahahahahaha!

***

Sikat daw pero bakit pinagwewelgahan ang show ng mga commercial?

PINANOOD namin last Sunday eve ang show ng isang mahusay na gay comedian-host.

Nakapagtataka lang na zero commercial load ito at puro house ads lang ang nakalagay.

Why oh why? If it’s true that the show is rating, why then is it being shunned away from by the ad men? Hahaha?

Hitsura ng show ni Ferminata, da ngangaerang lola na malapit nang matigbak sa Paparazzi.

Hahahahahahaha!

Going back to the supposedly popular movie and teevee personality, wala bang paniniwala sa kanya ang mga sponsor o hindi lang nila masakyan ang mala-comedy bar way of hosting nito?

If that is the case, why was it supported by the ad men when his show started off many months back?

Totoo bang mahina na ang show nito sa ratings kaya parang may sakit na nakahahawa na ina-avoid na siya ng mga commercial?

Sayang naman ang kanyang popularidad kung kay daling nawala ang ningning ng kanyang kasikatan.

***

Governor ER Ejercito’s passion

IF HIS famed uncle Joseph Ejercito Estrada’s passion was Mowelfund, Governor ER Ejercito’s ‘addiction’ happens to be the resurrection of the globally famous Laguna de Bay that used to be highly pristine and a tourist attraction as well many years ago but indiscretions of the people living within its vicinity has turned it into a living nightmare of filth and human wastes.

Anyhow, with Governor ER’s and his wife Mayor Maita’s efforts, they intend to build a dike around the vicinity of the lake so that erosions will further be prevented and the cleanliness of the lake be ultimately restored.

Of course the budget for its restoration is inordinately enormous but Gov. Ejercito is firmly decided, with the help of his wife and constituents, to push through with the plan at all cost.

How so very nice of him to have such a lofty plan for the common good not only of today’s generation but for the many years to come.

***

Pagkatigok ng Paparazzi ikinabaliw ni Ferminata ngangaera!

WHAT goes up, must come down.

That is the law of gravity, dahlin’. Hahahahaha! And that is what’s exactly happening right now with Ferminata

Ngangaera’s showbiz oriented program Parazzi at TV5.

Right now, there are some blunt speculatons that it’s going to be purportedly replaced by another show with Ruffa Gutierrez, Mariel Rodriguez and Lucy Torres as anchors.

Hahahahahahaha!

How pathetic!

Mali nga pala ang premise natin dahil there never was a time that the show did rate.

Hahahahahahaha!

With a face like that, no one would have the initiative, much more the slightest of interest, to watch it on a boring Sunday afternoon. Hahahahaha!

Anyway, it was moved much later on to the Saturday slot which has ultimately become its funeral. Hahahahahaha!

Lalong natigok ang sisinghap-singhap ng viewership nito dahil parang itinapon ka nga naman sa Lion’s den. Hahahahaha!

Maipit ka ba naman sa pagitan ng Eat Bulaga at It’s Showtime, pa’no ka na teh?

Hahahahahahaha!

Que barbaridad!

Anyhow, to be able to salvage her dignity, Lola Nganga did talk to another lengua who has the delusions that she is one of today’s finest writers in tinsel town when she’s inept as a goat.

Inept as a goat daw, o! Hakhakhak!

Sa true, every time I get to see this delusory lesbo in some presscons, feeling sikat ang namumutla ang mga mamad na labing lola. Hahahahahahaha!

Kaya naman pala inombag at pinatulan talaga ito ng friend naming si Gary Sta. Ana dahil ilusyunada at feeling well-connected and influencial when she’s nothing but a pretentious ninny. Hahahahahahaha!

Mabuti nga may nagpapasulat sa ilung tiburcia na ‘to gayung wala naman siyang K at feeling edukada lang, bobita naman ever. Hahahahahahaha!

Cheeeaaaapppp!

Anyhow, in the event that Paparazzi eventually gets axed, what’s going to happen to Lola Fermi?

Is she going to go back peddling her master pieces at Obra ni Tsaka or would she push through with her obnoxious show racket? hahahahahahaha!

Honestly, she can always go back to her AC/DC way of writing or peddle her ‘wares’ to the movie people that she can harass by way of her cheap attack and collect, defend and collect way of writing. Hahahahaha!

Adios Lola Luckresya. You more than deserve what you’re going through because you’re uncouth and nauseatingly cavalier. Hahahahahahahahaha!

He who laughts last, laughs the loudest and I’m beginning to do it right now!

Hahahahahahaha!

***

Hardworking Governor Vi takes a respite

ALL work and no play makes Pilar a dull girl.

That must have been Governor Vilma Santo’s dictum that’s why she’ll fly off to Singapore with her family to take a respite from all the hustle and bustle of being a governor on April 3 and will be back on April 8.

The whole family are going to be there minus Luis who is too pre-occupied with his hosting career and other showbiz commitments to be able to take some time off.

Buti na lang, naririyan si Ryan Christian para mabawasan ang pagka-miss ni Ate Vi sa kanyang panganay who now seems to have a life of his own and a career to take care of as well.

Anyhow, Senator Ralph Recto is perennially around to keep her company and the whole gang that includes Senator Ralph mom, Ate Vi’s siblings Lyn and Joel, family friend Neal and Maricar (sister of the late Francis M.) with sons Fons and Brian.

Come to think of it, deserved naman ni Ate Vi ang vacation na ‘to dahil she’s definitely one of the most hardworking governors in the country today.

In the meantime, tuloy pa rin ang twice a week shoot niya for Star Cinema’s The Healing kung saan co-star niya si Kim Chiu at marami pang iba.

***

Benjamin Tang, German-Vietnamese who loves staying in the Philippines

ANYWHERE he goes doing some fashion and ramp modelling, Benjamin Tang, a German-Vietnamese, has always been a sensation.

So far, he’s been chosen by Cosmo mag as one of its hot hunks.

Lately, he has appeared in some commercials and has consistently been much sought-after in some modelling assignments.

To date, he’s been in our country for barely a year and yet modelling jobs and commercials are piling up.

Nakapagtataka ba when he’s delectably well-endowed and a hot guy as well?

Hahahahahahaha!

***

Animal na vavalina ‘di mapakali!

HAHAHAHAHA! Naaaning ang Pocholo Avilang (uncircumcized vagah at 63 years old! Hakhakhak!) si Joey ‘Vavalina’ de Castro nang ma-realize naming ginagamit lang pala niya ang mga Dongyans fanatics kuno ni Marianita to hit back at us.

Whatever, this duldolic creature (duldolic creature raw, o! Hahahahaha!) has been frantically sending in repul -sive hate messages at our cell (as if naman I get affected… Hahahahaha1 I don’t give a hoot about ugly and aging cheap faggots! Hahahahahaha1) zeroing in on our relationship with Ms. Claire dela Fuente and her wards Bela Padilla and Sam Pinto.

Kesyo nilalangaw raw ang FHM (really old hag of a fag? Hahahahaha!) with Bela P. on the cover and no one seems to show a modicum of interest to it.

Really?

Is that soooo?

Hay naku, lola, why don’t you gargle a potent mouth wash so that the nauseatingly malodorous smell emanating from your filthy mouth would eventually be contained? Hahahahaha!

Anyway, kapalmuks talaga ang mabahongang gurang na ‘to.

Hahahahahahaha!

Imagine, Ms. Claire has assiduously been doling out some cash for his subsistence but typical of him, he’s hitting her behind her back by saying nasty and untakable things about her protegees Bela and Sam.

Kesyo laos na raw ang mga ito at wala namang narating sa industriya when he knows that Bela’s FHM cover has become a veritable sensation and Sam a class to follow.

Ito talagang si Vavalina ay likas na ingrata.

Imagine, off and on for more than 20 years ay pinatira namin ang walang budhing halimaw na ‘to pero nagawa pang lait-laitin by way of using her cheap sim cards ang anak naming si Christopher who was so nice and loving to him when he was still alive.

Ang makagagawa ng ganong kababoy na gawain sa isang ‘anghel’ ay kampon lang ng kadilimang tulad ni Vavalina.

Kaya sa palagay ko lang, if there is hell really, this abominable creature deserves to be there.

‘Yun lang!

***

Send in those sizzling stories that you know about our fave showbiz personalities at pete_ampoloquio@yahoo.com and #09994269588, #09276557791 and #09223870129 and read them here.

And with that, ito po ang kuya Pete ninyo na nagsasabing, Christopher, my son, I love you very, very much, my love for you goes beyond eternity.

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