Sexual demands ng libogerang aktres, ‘di kinaya ng young businessman!

HAHAHAHAHA! Undefeated talaga sa tindi ng kaelyahan ang prominent ang kavivigang not-so-young sexy actress na ‘to na isang certified man eater.

Man eater raw talaga, o! Hahahahahahahahaha!

Say ng isang ombreng nakausap natin lately, inlababu raw naman sana ang male friend niya sa sexy actress na ‘to before pero suko siya sa tindi ng libido nito ever. Hahahahahahahahaha!

Sa tuwing magkakaroon daw kasi ng sexual encounters ang dalawa, sa halip na excitement ay trauma at apprehension raw (trauma at apprehension raw, o! Hahahahahaha!) ang nararamdaman ng ombre who was then only in his early 20s. Hakhakhak!

Kaya n’yo ‘yan? Early 20s palang sumusuko na sa man eater na girlalung itetch? Hahahahahaha!

Para raw kasing mauubusan ng ratbulites ang tisay na aktres lalo na’t tinatalbugan nito ang legendary blow job skills ni Linda Lovelace.

Could you imagine that? Walang binesa supposedly ang unmatched sexual expertise ni Ms. Lovelace as compared to this svelte actress’s ability to fellate a throbbing dick? Hakhakhak!

How shocking can you get! Hahahahahahahahahahaha!

Kunsabagay, lalayo pa ba tayo?

Hindi nga ba’t nagmistulang sinipsipan ng sanrekwang bayota ang paparu niya before nu’ng time na they were still very much an item?

Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Dahil sa tindi ng kanyang kuflangeric ability and tremendous sexual demands in bed, nagka-trauma ang ombre sa sex at kadalasa’y hinihimatay sa comfort room kapag nagsu-show na sa abroad. Hahahahahahahaha!

Ikaw ba naman ang gawing midnight snack, breakfast, lunch, merienda at dinner ang nota mo, how would you feel?

Hakhakhakhakhak!

Di ba’t nakauumay? Hahahahahahahahahahaha!

Kaya kahit na flawless at gandara ang girlalu ay hiniwalayan na rin ng paparung bangkayotic na halos ang itzu dahil sa kau-umum ng addicted yata sa ratbulites na girlalu. Hahahahahahahaha!

Sa true, after his traumatic affair with the man-eating and dick-fellating sexy actress, it took quite some- time before the singer-actor was able to recover, health-wise. Hahahahahahaha!

Que pobrecito usted! Hakhakhak!

‘Yun na!

***

Ate Vi never na nagpaapi kahit kanino!

ONE thing that her million of zealous supporters all over the archipelago like about Queenstar Vilma Santos is the fact that she’s a fighter and a born winner and has never allowed anyone to exploit or take advantage of her or step on her toes in any way possible.

Never siyang naging api-apihan like you-know-who and has always fought for her right in the sun in the best way she can.

Kaya nga siguro naririyan pa rin si Ate Vi after five decades ay dahil sa matindi ang kanyang survival instinct and she really knows how to give a good fight, her diminutive size notwithstanding.

No wonder, the stars of today are veritably in awe of what she has become, along with her formidable achievements both in the world of politics and show business as well.

On top of that, bongga rin ang kanyang self-esteem at never siyang nag-stoop sa ka-cheap-an ng kanyang detractors.

Period. Walang comma! Hahahahahahahahaha!

***

Elmo Magalona’s oohmph!

MARAMI ring mga gwaping na young actors sa GMA but it’s an unassailable fact that it’s Elmo Magalona who’s definitely one of the most appealing. Hahahahahahahaha!

Kapag presscon na lang ng kanyang soaps (tulad na lang nitong Together Forever nila ni Julie Anne San Jose) ay tahimik na tahimik talaga ang entertainment press dahil sa kai-estimate sa kanyang bulge.

Bulge raw talaga, o! Hahahahahahahaha!

Well, a chip off the old block naman kasi si Elmo baby, if you know the salient point I’m hinting at (Hahahahaha!).

Kay Elmo pa rin, maganda ang story line ng soap nila ni Julie Anne.

It deals with the pains of growing up without your parents’ guidance, just like what’s happening with Elmo, Janine Gutierrez, and Renz Valerio whose parents died of a tragic accident when they were still very young.

Sa totoo, cute ang dating ng tandem nina Elmo at Julie Anne dahil obvious na pareho pa silang walang masyadong muwang sa takbo ng buhay.

Tipong young love, sweet love ba. Hahahahahahaha!

Anyway, it airs every Sunday right after Party Pilipinas.

***

Tita Annabelle ready to fight

BONGGACIOUS naman talaga itong diamond manager na si Ms. Annabelle Rama.

Kararating palang niya from the States last Sunday, early Monday morning ay go na agad sila ng kanyang lawyer na si Atty. Howard Calleja sa Quezon city Hall of Justice to settle things out.

Prior to that, nag-file na pala last week pa ang kanyang original lawyer na si Atty. Agnes Maranan ng motion to lift warrant of arrest.

Anyway, after giving some valid explanation why Tita Annabelle wasn’t able to attend the hearing last Monday, Judge Eleuterio Bathan has issued an order to have the warrant of arrest issued last Monday lifted.

As of the moment, back to work na naman si Tita Annabelle now that everything has been settled and ironed out.

Dapat lang!

Workaholic namang talaga ang ermats nina Ruffa at Richard Gutierrez and for us, she’s one of the few personalities in the business that we’re genuinely fond of.

Hindi man kami madalas magkita, never naming nakalimutan ‘yung ginawa nilang pagdalo sa joint birthday celebration namin ni Christopher (how I dearly miss you, my baby!) many years ago.

Honestly, Tita Annabelle is one of the few people in the business that we are genuinely fond of basically because she happens to be real and honest.

‘Di ba  siya tulad ng iba riyang mga plastikada at ipokrita.

***

Magtanong ka sa Ateneo de Naga kung ‘di ako nag-aral dun!

I’M NOT into this internet thing from way, way back.

‘Yung laptop ko na regalo sa akin ni Nong (yes, supot na Joey ‘Vavalina’ de Cashtrue..he’s still very much around loving me sincerely because I’m not doltish like you and handsome and good-natured, too! Hahahahaha!), I would only use it for deadline purposes but I was never into this surfing at the net thing or anything related to the it.

Nevertheless, the other day, Joe C., one of our loyal listeners at our radio show Star na Star at DWIZ (882 Khz in your radio dial, 2 to 3 pm, Monday thru Friday) texted us to keep us updated about the diabolical things that Joey ‘Supot’ de Cashtrue has been posting ignominiously at the net.

Sabi raw ng walang credibility na uncircumcised (Hahahahahaha! so bahooooo!) fag na ‘to, bakit naman daw magsi-seminar sa amin ang idiota at insekuridang si Ferminata, da lolang mukhang anda at super ogra (Hahahaha!), gayong ‘di naman daw kami nag-aral sa Ateneo de Naga at sa isang pipitsuging university lang supposedly somewhere in Bicol.

Tarantadong matandang mali-mali ang spoken at written English kaya wala talagang narating, saksi kang panget ka kapag nagri-reunion kami ng mga classmates ko sa Ateneo pero nagpipilit kang gumawa ng kwento dahil namamatay ka sa inggit dahil sa isang kwarto-kwartito ka lang nakatira sa San Mateo, Rizal at wala halos makain at puro fancy jewels ang suot na coated with cutex para ‘di mangitim. Hahahahahahahahaha!

How so very cheap! Hahahahahaha!

Nagnaknak ang inggit mo sa sooo baho at panat mong katawan dahil you’re now a goner.

Pinandirihan ka na nga ng mga lalaki sa Baguio nang magpunta ka roon, (with a face like that, who would have the bravura to do it with you in bed? Hahahahahaha!) ‘di ba naman?

Sabi nga pala ni Peter L., huwag ka raw magpapakita sa kanya dahil ipa-flash niya sa inidoro ang ingrata mong pagmumukha na lumamon ng 25 years sa bahay namin pero kung makapanira sa amin sa internet na ‘yan ay para bang wala kaming nagawang kabutihan sa mukhang butiking ograng matandang ito. Hahahahahaha!

Rot in hell, neanderthal gurang! Dun nababagay ang mga ingratang tulad mo.

***

Jacinto Oropeza, irresistible & huge!

HE WAS adjudged first runner-up at the annual search for Mr. Venezuela wayback in the year 2005.

Seven years after, he’s still being avidly talked about by way of his sizzling magazine pictorials that more than showcased his sumptuous almost naked body.

And why not? He’s been able to hold on to his youth and innate sexiness.

***

Paula Bianca’s promise

SHE’S not in a hurry to fulfill her childhood fantasy of becoming a singer of some renown but Paula Bianca is deadset in carving a niche at the celluloid firmament.

Kunsabagay, with a powerful voice like that, along with the prodigious support of her dad Papa Dhan C., there is no reason why she won’t be able to make it big at the local tin-pan alley.

Kung vocal quality kasi ang pag-uusapan, there is no doubt that her voice is definitely one of the finest, if not the best in the field.

Hindi kasi ito namimili ng piyesa at kaya niyang banatan kahit na ano’ng klase ng kanta with her terrific vocal skills that’s definitely God-given.

Do listen to her song Napaksakit Naman, an original composition of the award-winning composer Vehnee saturno, and be convinced that she’s indeed one singer worth watching for.

***

Send in those sizzling stories that you know about our fave showbiz personalities at pete_ampoloquio@yahoo.com and #09994269588, #09276557791 and #09223870129 and read them here.

And with that, ito po ang kuya Pete ninyo na nagsasabing, Christopher, my son, I love you very, very much, my love for you goes beyond eternity.

Adios. Mabalos. I always need you, Nong!

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