Deadma lang si Ruffa sa mga intriga

KUNG si Lola Ferminata ay halos lumawit na ang dila sa kababanat kay Ms. Ruffa Gutierrez sa kanyang cheaply written columns, the former Ms. World Princess did not bother to glorify the sour-graping TV host/writer at the presscon she had tendered at the very classy Aracama (formerly The Fort) resto in connection with the relaunching of her website and Roof-A-Child Foundation the other day.

All throughout the presscon proper, Ms. Ruffa talked lengthily, animatedly even, about her foundation, along with her lofty plans in connection with its activities this year.

“The world of entertainment has been very good to me,” she asseverates. “I owe much of what I am today to it, but more to those in the industry who have helped me along the way and to the countless, faceless people,young and old, who patronized my body of work.”

Personally, she claims to be very much blessed and is purportedly sated with what she has at the moment.

‘Yun nga namang mga nang-iintriga sa kanya ay ni hindi man lang umabot ni katiting sa kanyang lofty accomplish-ments, along with the highly learned and cosmopolitan woman that she has evolved into.

Kaya nga siguro halhal na ang dela (dela raw talaga, o! Hakhakhak!) ni Lola Fermi, da tsakistic toothelss cro ne, dahil mum is the word lang ang drama ni Ms. Ruffa sa kanyang mga patutsada and not even once did she come to glorify her seemingly endless caustic ribbings.

Toothless crone raw talaga, o! Hahahahaha!

How diabolically gross! Hakhakhak!

Anyway, for her birthday this year, Ms. Ruffa, along with her friends (BB Gandang Hari, Phoemela Baranda, Cristalle Belo, and her daughters Lorin and Venice) gave the biggest blowout ever when she unselfishly helped build five houses for Habitat for Humanity.

Kaya eat your heart out, La Loba Negra, (La Loba Negra raw talaga, o! Hahahahahahahahaha!)  Nothing can intimidate Ms. Ruffa at the moment, not even your gory and horribly written caustic write-ups on her that reek with unadulterated cheapness and abysmal pretensions. Hakhakhak!

Magbait-baitan ba when it’s common knowledge that she is a witch of a bitch!

Tigilan mo na nga pala si Rufa Mae Quinto dahil wala naman siyang ginagawang masama sa ‘yo, bruhang matanda.

Bruhang matanda raw talaga, o! Hakhakhak!

How so very apt, especially so basing from the way she looks with his uncontrollable mane of hair and sokpa- lites dentures!

Hahahahahahahahahaha!

Aminin mo ng super inggit ka sa beauty nila ni Ms. Ruffa dahil gurangis ka na and sooo laki your tiyanetch, a-long with your unsightly-looking bilblash. Hakhakhak!

Ayokooooooooooooooooh1 Hahahahahahahahaha!

Patsuktsak tienes mo na nga pala ang ilongski (ilongski raw, o! Hahahahahahaha!) mo dahil very disturbing ang dating lalo na’t binibigyan ka ng close-up shots sa ratingless na Juice-less. Hakhakhak!

Jesus H. Christ! you scare most people without meaning to, lola.

Without meaning to raw talaga, o! Hahahahahahahahahahaha!

Why don’t you just pay your former gay lover at the defunct Pocketbelt (pocketbelt daw talaga, o! Hakhakhak!) a visit and maybe, have a real icky time together. Hahahahahahahahaha!

Yuck! Yosi kadiri!

Sariling matris nilalafanggetch ever. Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Kumusta na kaya ang brass bed na gibsona mo sa kanya? Is he still sleeping on it? Hahahahahahaha!

Maybe so, but this time, with another guy whose dick is soo huge, he couldhardly take it in his already caver-nous mouth. Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Cavernous mouth daw talaga, o! Hahahahahahahahahaha!

‘Yun lang!

***

The Healing ni Ate Vi, pinakaaabangan

Just like the real pro that she’s always been, Queenstar Ms. Vilma Santos had finished her dubbing for The Healing, along with its full trailer, the other day in spite of experiencing a highly discomfiting chronic off and on fever.

“That’s true,” her official secretary/confidante Ate Aida Fandialan avers. “She completed the dubbing of the trailer for The Healing but on our way home, she complained of headache and sore throat dahil sa kasisigaw.

“This is a suspense/horror and not a horror/suspense movie,” she elucidates.

Anyway, its full trailer was shown at The Buzz yesterday and was introduced formally by Ate Vi’s nemesis in the movie Kim Chiu.

As sched, The Healing is slated to detonate in some 100 giant cinemas all over the country on July 25.

The movie’s a big break for young actor Martin del Rosario since most of his scenes are with Ate Vi, thereby giving him the kind of maximum exposures that he’s badly in need of.

***

Paula Bianca, Tambayan 101.9FM’S Best New Artist 2012

Things are wonderfully shaping up for Paula Bianca, the comely daughter of Papa Dhan C.

Imagine, out of the plethora of newcomers competing for the title Tambayan 101.9FM’s new artist for the year 2012, she is the one who’s been able to bag the accolade.

Pretty impressive, isn’t it?

Apart from that, cited din siya sa PMPC Star Awards for Music in three categories.

Namely: Best New Female recording artist, Female Rock Artist of the Year, and Rock Album of the year.

O, di ba naman?

When it rains, it veritably pours.

Congrats, Ms. Paula. Lalo mong pagbutihin and show them the kind of genuine talent that you are!

***

Hurting dahil passe’ na ang popularidad

Bagama’t hindi nagsasalita, (come to think of it, she has always been reticent even from way, way back and hasnever welcomed the idea of being interviewed) obvious na hurting ang dating sikat na aktres na ‘to dahil sa a-bysmal outcome ng kanyang dati-rati’y prodigious showbiz career.

Sa totoo, parang aligaga siyang di mo malaman kung bakit, dahil on its lowest ebb na naman ang kanyang showbiz career unlike her arch rival whose career appears to be perpetually brilliantly shining.

Sino ba naman kasi ang dapat sisihin?

In all the years that she’s been in this business, she seems not to have learned one iota about its intrica- cies and complications.

In some of her earlier interviews, going back to her roots (they were practically poor as a rat) has purported -ly never intimidated or frightened her one iota.

Could it be true?

Oh, well, from the way things are horribly unfolding, she just might end-up following the horribly traumatic footsteps of the late Carmen Rosales who started out prodigiously in the business, only to end up practically a pauper.
Que miserable usted! Hahahahahahahaha!

Anyway, kung hindi talaga magbabago ang dating sikat na aktres na ‘to na ngayo’y parang nasa Twilight Zone naang popularidad, all indications point to the fact that from rags to riches, and then back to rags ang kanyang magiging drama.

How pathetic!

***

Patrick Ribbsaeter warfreak

Hahahaha! For a change, we’d to feature an international model named Patrick Ribbsaeter who has made headlines all over the world when he ferociously attacked her Arabian princess’s chauffeur after she caught him ha ving sex with other women in her flat.

Labeled as gold digger, he was sued by the Arabian princess for what he’s done to her personal bodyguard.

Hahahahahaha! Hindi lang sa Pinas maintriga ang buhay-buhay ng mga celebrities.

Kahit saan ay matitindi talaga ang mga chika’t intriga.

As always, bawal magtikol. Baka maombag din kayo. Hahahahahahaha!

***

Magbababong pabolosa ang ratings at unkabogable

Nakabibilib (hayan Ferminata, huh? salitang ugat ang inuulit Lola Tontita…Lola Tontita raw talaga, o! Hahaha -haha!) talaga itong early afternoon soap (it goes on the air after It’s Showtime at ABS CBN) na Mundo Man Ay Magunaw, na take-off sa top-rating radio soap ng kababayan naming si Salvador Royales na co-drama talent na-min noon sa DZDR Bombo radyo sa Naga city.

Imagine, from the very beginning up to the very end, unkabogable ito at never na bumaba sa 50 ad placements ba -wat airing.

Bilib ka, Bubonika, the rat-faced tsaka? Hahahahahahahaha!

Anyway, dahil sa endless requests ng mga avid followers nito, extended for another week ang soap nina Ms. Eula Valdez, Empress, Nikki Gil, at Ejay Falcon, among many others.

Come to think of it, kaya naman di ito mabitaw-bitawan ng kanilang mga tagasubaybay ay dahil sa matindi rin ang efforts na ibinibigay ng grupo sa kanilang mga physically and emotionally draining scenes.  Nito na lang pumasyal kami sa set nila somewhere in Antipolo city, talaga namang tuhog ang mga eksena at halos matuyuan na ng luha ang lead actresses na sina Eula, Empress at Nikki dahil sa tindi ng pag-e-emote. Kaya watch tayo sa grand finale nito on the second week of July.

Dapat lang!

Send in those sizzling stories that you know about our fave showbiz personalities at pete_ampoloquio@yahoo.com and #09994269588, #09276557791 and #09223870129 and read them here.

And with that, ito po ang kuya Pete ninyo na nagsasabing, Christopher, my son, I love you very, very much, my love for you goes beyond eternity.

Adios. Mabalos. I always need you, Nong!

 

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