Nabuking na claving kaya biglang binasted!

HOW sad naman on the part of this macho gay actor (macho gay raw talaga, o! Hahahahahahaha!) who’s desperately trying to find for his place in the sun but is not quite a success at it.

Imagine, nakailang chicks na rin naman siya sa show business pero sa hiwalayan blues rin nauuwi ang lahat dahil nari-realize ng mga girlalus na palihim siyang nagtitilam-tilam sa mga male dakotas (male dakotas raw talaga, o! Hahahahahahaha!) na nagkatusak sa industriya lately. Hahahahahahaha!

Classic talaga ang naging eksena niya sa isang Brazilian belle na minahal naman sana siya, in fairness, pero naaning talaga dahil na-realize nitong palihim siyang naglalaway (naglalaway raw talaga, o! Hakhakhak!) sa mga well-endowed males in tight-fitting maongs that more than highlight their endowments na nagkalat sa industriya. Hahahahahahahahaha!

Ang mga baklitas talaga, oo! kanya-kanyang drama’t eksena. Harharharharhar!

Pero ang pinaka-sad talaga ay ang ginawang pagpapatigil sa kanyang manligaw ng isang Korean-looking young actress dahil ramdam na ramdam raw nito ang kanyang malalansang mga eksena.

Malalansang mga eksena? Ayokoooooooooooh! Hahahahaha!

Sayang na sayang talaga ang bisexual na ombre na ‘to na work of art pa naman sana ang katawan at kagwapuhan.

Kung tarugs naman ang pag-uusapan, well, he has it, too! Hahahahahahaha!

Sayang na tarugski. Daks pa naman sana. ‘Yun nga lang, kapwa tarugs rin ang hanap!

Kapwa tarugs rin daw ang hanap, o! Hahahahahahahahaha!

‘Yun na!

***

Hunk at 45! Sosyal!

SANDAMAKMAK ang mga bagets na nangagsisipag-agawan para mapansin sa industriya.

Most of them are even willing to become the kept men of the influential gays in the industry but they were ignominiously eclipsed by Richard Yap’s overflowing charisma.

A couple of days ago, the very hunky and papable Papa Chen of the gay community (Hahahahahaha! Sorry Mr. Richard but the gays would really love to fantasize about you ever since you appeared in that noodle commercial more than a year ago) has signed-up a two-year management contract with ABS CBN.

Quite an achievement indeed knowing pretty well that most networks would only sign-up pubescent talents. Hahahahaha!

Pero kakaiba nga ang charisma at hunky appeal ni Papa Chen, lahat na lang yata ay gustong maging papa ang lead actor ng Be Careful With My Heart. Hahahahahahaha!

Of course Papa Chen is not the kind who would make patol but he seems not to mind gays fantasizing about him. Hahahahahaha!

Anyhow, it’s indeed awesome how he’s been able to maintain his seeming youth at an age when most men are already lined and potbellied. Hahahahahahaha!

Well, that, my dear, is what you’d call as discipline.

Napanonood nga pala from Monday thru Friday ang Be Careful With My Heart everyday from 10:45 am and with replays on Saturdays at the same time.

***

Wala nang arrive que sabrosong tarugs!

DATI-rati, gays were sooo fascinated with his hunky appeal.

Idagdag mo pa ang kanyang katilam-tilam na tarugs na can afford to swing both ways raw at talaga namang lalo siyang nagiging kapanta-pantasya sa paningin ng mga beking hangap sa tarugs.

Beking hangap sa tarugs raw, o! Hakhakhak!

Suffice to say, lalong na-confirm ang kanyang kadakilaan nang maging dyowaers siya ng isang super intelligent lady who’s dumb when it comes to love. Hahahahahahaha!

Most of the men she got entangled with were mostly delectably huge, apart from being veritably good looking. Hahahahahahahaha!

Anyhow, their union didn’t last that long but long enough for them to have a cute looking, albeit kind of spoiled, son.

What I find quite sad is the fact that he seems to have lost his charisma with the press now that he’s no longer the husband of this voluble movie and TV personality.

Hindi niya pala carry na i-maintain ang kanyang enigma at charisma on his own, he needs the strength and flamboyant personality of his former wife to maintain the fiery kind of interest that he used to exude when they were still together.

How pathetic!

‘Yun na!

***

‘Tiktik: The Aswang Chronicle’ unique ang pagkagawa!

SA premiere night ng isang GMA films youth oriented movie, napanood namin ang trailer ng Tiktik: the Aswang Chronicle na pinagbidahan nina Dingdong Dantes at Lovi Poe.

Even then, super impressed na talaga kami sa ganda ng obra ng comebacking director of the late 90s na si Erik  Matti na protege ni Peque Gallaga who’s now being avidly missed by his horde of followers.

Hollywoodesque talaga ang arrive nito at superb ang special effects na dapat lang naman dahil magaling nga ang direktor nitong si Direk Erik na aral na aral sa mga special effects ni Direk Peque.

Kung ikukumpara ang iba nating horror pics rito sa obra ni Direk Erik, magmumukha silang amateurish.
Sa totoo lang, the genius of an Erik Matti is further complimented by the new technology in filmmaking these days.

‘Yun bang karamihan sa mga eksena ng mga aktor (Lovi and Dingdong in particular) ay chroma shot at wala talaga silang kaeksena at binibigyan lang ng briefing ni Direk Erik on what the scene is all about so they could give the proper reactions.

Wala talagang keber rito si Papa Dong kung unglamorous man (with bags and all) ang kanyang mga kuha as long as maibigay niya ang right shade of emotion that the scene demands.

Mapanonood na nga pala on October 17 ang Tiktik: The Aswang Chronicle kung saan isa sa mga producers si Dingdong Dantes, ang GMA 7 at marami pang iba.

***

Send in those sizzling stories that you know about our fave showbiz personalities at pete_ampoloquio@yahoo.com

and #09994269588, #09276557791 and #09223870129 and read them here.

And with that, ito po ang kuya Pete ninyo na nagsasabing, Christopher, my son, I love you very, very much, my love for you goes beyond eternity. Adios. Mabalos. I always need you, Nong!

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